I was talking with a friend the other day about self-help books and how she doesn’t appreciate them, partly because she’s tried some of the things and they haven’t given her the depth of transformation that she desires.
I found this interesting because as a coach, I’m in the transformation business. I help people make changes that positively impact their work and life, helping my clients discover different tools to identify what is important to them and ways of making changes that stick. This conversation got me thinking about growing edges, transformation, and the tools necessary to make lasting change in our lives.
Here are the things I know about personal transformation: it’s messy, it requires focusing on the long game, it can be disillusioning, it unlocks a freedom within that is wholly different from the freedom of which culture speaks, it requires good amounts of self-reflection, and it can be absolutely terrifying.
Our growing edges are those places that feel rough, uncomfortable, and dangerous. They’re the places in our lives where we are itching for change to make us better people. They’re growing edges because often we’re invited into a new way of being that is different from the ways in which we previously operated in the world. Living at this edge keeps us humble, expectant, and often frustrated!
Yet when we push through the fear, discomfort, and unknowing to intentionally grow, the benefits are enormous. We’re more resilient, kind, generous, effective, cognizant of our time and where we want to use it, and clear on what’s important in life. We are freer to make good choices and live the life we actually want to live.
There are lots of tools available to us to make these transformational changes, with coaching being one of them. A coach is part of a bigger network of people who support us, including counselors, mentors, spiritual guides, medical staff, and good friends who aren’t afraid to tell us when we’re being unrealistic.
Questions to ponder:
● Who is part of my support network?
● Are these people truly helpful or are they remnants of a person I used to be?
● Does my network need to be tweaked to help me make the most of life and work?
Stay curious friends!