One of my friends said to me many years ago, our lives are like onions, we must pull back the layers to get to the core of who we are. I happen to like onions, and they can be quite strong. There are times in our lives when we don’t like our situation and feel like we don’t know what to do about it. We can get stuck in the cycle of evaluating options without making any forward progress. When we’re in this cycle we overanalyze, which results in not trusting ourselves or our inner knowing. Yes, data are important. At the same time we need to make headway so that we progress and grow as humans.
Facing ourselves (ahem, our faults and unhelpful habits) by peeling back our onion layers is an uncomfortable process we need to go through to grow. We pull back the layers one at a time with varying time in between removing each layer, giving us space to breathe between sensory assaults. Regardless of how often we peel back a layer, the process of removing something that is a hindrance to our lives is the important part. So at this point you might be asking, “How do I do this? What are the steps?” Here are the broad steps needed to identify the layer and then take steps to peel it away.
· Pay attention. Notice where your uncomfortable, dissatisfied, or doing something that is directly holding you back from achieving your goals. (This step could take a while.)
· Identify the specific area in your life you want to change. Name it. Describe it in detail. Look at it from several different angles and get others’ input if necessary.
· Identify how your life would be different if you removed this obstacle (unhelpful mindset, habit, behavior pattern, etc.). Again, describe it in detail as much as possible. Name the emotions that you will have (satisfaction, freedom, happiness, relief, etc.) when you make this change.
· Make the change, outlining the steps or process needed to have the change stick. Commit to yourself that you will make this adjustment. Ask others for help to hold you accountable.
If you’re looking to make change in your life, this is a place to start.
If you’re looking for help in making changes in your life, send us an email, we’d be happy to chat to see if Dream Big Coaching is right for you at this time.
Stay curious friends!