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Conflict Is Good For Us!

This month I’m leading two events on conflict resolution. One for church leaders and the other for women entrepreneurs. What I’ve noticed is that it doesn’t matter who you are, conflict is a part of our lives.

Conflict isn’t a bad thing. In fact, I think conflict gives us the opportunity for self-reflection and self-discovery. As leaders, it’s more effective to respond instead of react. And responding takes intentionality. In any external conflict, we need to be intentional about word choice and have an explanation for what we feel and why we feel it. We must take the time to identify what’s going on inside of us, what hot button has been pushed, and what words will be most productive and edifying for the conversation. This is a step that many people skip over because it’s uncomfortable, we don’t know how to tap into what we feel, we’re avoiders, etc. And yet this is one of the most important steps.

Coaching is very helpful when it comes to self-discovery and motivation, especially in times of heightened emotion or conflict. The coaching relationship provides a safe place to explore our internal conflict (what we feel and why we feel it), and then craft a conversation starter or talking points to effectively respond to the external conflict.

One of my clients said it so well, “I continue coaching because you help me come up with the language I need to use in my difficult conversations.” Hooray!

As we move through April, I’ll highlight the different causes of conflict and provide a question for you to ponder to develop additional self-awareness and strengthen the “respond” muscle.

Question to ponder: How do I react and respond when faced with conflict?

Stay curious friends!

PS- It’s not too late to sign up for the Blair County Women Entrepreneurs’ workshop from noon to one pm on April 20! Register through this link: WE-LEaD Virtual Workshop (

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